


Parallels (Or: The Lessons Rey Learned From Kira When She Traveled To Another Universe)

by radioactivesaltghoul



Series: make kireylo a thing 2k19 [1]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Crack, Cunnilingus, Enthusiastic Consent, Kira And Rey Are Not Related, Lesbian Sex, Multi, Self-cest, Smut, Threesome - F/F/M, Vaginal Sex, Virgin Ben Solo, Virgin Rey (Star Wars), all aboard the "Fucking Your AU Self Is Great" train, kireylo, make kireylo a thing 2k19
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-09
Updated: 2019-08-27
Packaged: 2019-11-14 12:35:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 19,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18052610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/radioactivesaltghoul/pseuds/radioactivesaltghoul
Summary: When Rey makes a breakthrough with the Jedi texts, she knows she has to follow where it leads. She never expected to wake up in an apartment in a universe where another version of her and another version of Kylo are roommates.She definitely never expected it to lead tothis.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [These Things Come In Threes](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17569955) by [AttackoftheDarkCurses](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AttackoftheDarkCurses/pseuds/AttackoftheDarkCurses), [SpaceWaffleHouseTM](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpaceWaffleHouseTM/pseuds/SpaceWaffleHouseTM). 



> hi i’m radioactivesaltghoul and i like throwing canon and AUs in a blender.
> 
> You should absolutely check out AttackoftheDarkCurses and SpaceWaffleHouseTM's breylo (Ben/Rey/Kylo) fic that inspired this. This is the kireylo (Kira/Rey/Ben) remix of that. #makekireyloathing2k19

It’s been eight months since Crait, and Rey is still getting nowhere with the Jedi texts. Nothing that she can find anywhere on the HoloNet is at all useful, and none of the knowledge in the Resistance’s databanks (including the millions of languages C-3PO knows) is relevant. Her attempts at calling on a Force ghost have all failed; she’s sure that Luke Skywalker is bouncing around somewhere, but he refuses to manifest for her.

...which leads to her current attempt to figure the books out out using brute force. Literally. She’s hurling the biggest one across the cargo hold on the _Millennium Falcon._

“You stupid, _kriffing_ books!” she shouts. “Can someone please just give me a break for once in my life?” It isn’t the most mature way of handling things, but it sure feels good to scream and blame something else.

Unsurprisingly, the book doesn’t respond to her question, and she groans before stomping over to pick it up off the floor. She bends down and pauses when she notices a figure on the page that she somehow hasn’t seen before, despite the number of times she’s spent poring over the book. “What the…?” she murmurs as she examines it more closely. It’s a symmetrical diagram with characters in a writing system that Rey can’t read, and for all that she’s glad to see something new coming out of the book, she’s frustrated by yet another thing that she doesn’t understand.

_Maybe I should meditate on it,_ she thinks. She isn’t particularly fond of meditation, but it’s an important Jedi practice. She’d rather be out there doing something, instead of inside _thinking_ about doing something. There’s also the added difficulty of her worries that she’ll slip into someone else’s thoughts during a practice that involves leaving her mind open, but she doesn’t want to think about that right now.

“Fine,” she mutters as she drops to the floor to sit in a cross-legged stance. “You win, old Jedi books. I’ll kriffing meditate.”

She closes her eyes, surprised to realize how easily the diagram on the page comes to the front of her mind. Rey has never had a photographic memory, but this is as clear as if she was looking at the actual page. She traces along every line in her mind, trying to dig deep into some long-buried memory in case she actually has seen that writing system before.

Rey doesn’t know how long she sits there, tracing over the diagram in her mind, before something _clicks._ It’s like a door opens in her mind, and when her eyes fly open, there’s an actual door standing in the middle of the cargo hold. “That’s new,” she murmurs to herself as she stands up. It doesn’t look particularly mystical or fancy, just a simple metal frame and wooden door with an old-fashioned door knob on it. She walked around the other side of it, trying to figure out where it goes. She sees the back of the door, but she has a feeling that if she were to go through it, she wouldn’t still be on the _Millennium Falcon._

As much as she doesn’t like the idea of running off into some unknown dimension, it’s clear what the Force wants her to do. At this point, Rey is so desperate for something to fall into place that she’s willing to open this mysterious door to an unknown dimension. She’s a strong believer in “never say ‘what’s the worst that could happen?’” but she’s confident that it can’t possibly be worse than some of the places she’s ended up since leaving Jakku.

Should she leave a note? Right now it’s just her, Chewie, and R2-D2. Most of the Resistance has spread out to a couple of different bases, where they’ve found allies in the war against the First Order. Finn and Rose are on one of those bases, Poe is off on a mission from General Organa herself, and Rey hasn’t really gotten to know anyone else. There’s a certain awe that comes from being “the last Jedi” (even though she barely feels like a Jedi) that makes her uncomfortable. The General, as if understanding Rey’s discomfort among the Resistance, has sent her off with Chewie to gather supplies. It never fails to amuse Rey that she’s become a smuggler with the legendary ship, but that amusement is usually tempered by the fact that it’s yet another thing to tie her to Ben Solo.

_No, don’t think about him._ There have been glimpses over the past few months, just quick enough to make Rey question whether or not she’s hallucinating. The worst ones come late at night, when insomnia is making her pace around the _Millennium Falcon,_ making notes of things to fix when she can find the time and parts to do so. She finds her thoughts drifting to places that are decidedly unprofessional and are thoughts that she definitely should not be having about her boss’s son, not to mention the fact that they’re enemies who have tried to kill each other multiple times at this point.

Yeah. Her life has gotten _really_ complicated lately.

The door wavers suddenly, and Rey wonders how much longer it’s going to stay there. She probably has time to leave a short note on her datapad, so she types out _There’s a Force thing I have to do, but I’ll be back. Don’t worry about me._ She wants to promise, but since she has no idea what this door means, she can’t do that. The door wavers again as she finishes the message. Rey grabs her newly constructed lightsaber, opens the door, and steps through. She sees a brief explosion of color and light before everything goes black.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I never truly understood the phrase "I have no explanation for this" until I wrote this fic.


	2. The landing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Does Kira have a long-lost twin that she never told Ben about, or is there some other reason Ben found her doppelganger lying on the living room floor?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short prologue = next chapter of this nonsense goes up quickly.

Ben frowns. What’s Kira doing on the floor? And what is she wearing? Not that he pays that much attention to his roommate, of course, but he’s pretty sure the belted drapey vest thing and armwraps she’s wearing are not a part of her normal wardrobe. Nor is the utility belt. As far as he knows, mechanics don’t wear utility belts like that.

Maybe she’s sick. Or she was so tired that she passed out on the floor earlier. Which is strange, but she _has_ been picking up some extra shifts at Maz’s lately. Even though officially she works full-time in Han’s garage, she picks up some under-the-table shifts when Maz needs some extra help.

In any case, he can’t just leave her on the floor. It’s not weird if he carries her to her room, right? That’s a normal thing roommates do for each other when they have totally platonic, non-sexual feelings for each other. Or something.

Something rolls off of her belt when he picks her up. _Probably her cell phone,_ he thinks. He’ll get it in a minute, after he puts her down. He’s pretty sure it’s pushing some sort of boundary to tuck her in, so he lays her on top of her bed, forcing himself to not pause and look at her because watching her sleep would be creepy. Instead, he walks back into the living room to get the tool he dropped. It rolls halfway under the couch, and he frowns as he looks at it. It doesn’t look like any tools he recognizes, although he admits that he isn’t exactly an expert. It’s a thin cylinder made of a lightweight metal with a switch on the side. Despite common sense telling him that it’s a bad idea to activate unknown objects, he presses the switch anyway and yelps when a blade of bright yellow light shoots out of one end and slices the couch in half. “What the fuck?” he yells, dropping it. It deactivates when it hits the floor, leaving Ben hyperventilating as he tries to figure out what kind of tool could possibly do that.

Ben spends the next ten minutes staring at the couch that is now neatly sliced in two pieces. What the fuck is Kira doing with something like that? Where did she get it? Han doesn’t keep that sort of thing around the garage. His father may be reckless, but he isn’t stupid enough to keep a weapon capable of slicing furniture as easily as butter around.

He’s still staring at the remains of the couch when he hears the scrape of a key in the door. He mentally goes through a list of who could possibly be unlocking the door right now. Has Kira given someone a key without consulting Ben? Rude, and pretty shitty. No, she isn’t always the easiest person to live with, but he doesn’t think she’d just give out a spare key.

He’s not prepared for the sound of Kira singing to herself as she swung the door open. _What the...?_ Kira is already home. He just saw her, and there’s no way she can leave her bedroom without going back through the living room. “If I order pizza, will you eat any?” she asks.

“Kira?”

He hears the jangle of keys being placed on the kitchen table. “Who else?” she asks. When he doesn’t respond, she walks into the living room and freezes as she takes in the sight of the destroyed couch. “Ben, what the fuck did you do to my couch?”

Actually, it’s his couch, but that point seems irrelevant at the moment.

“And why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost?” she adds.

He looks from Kira to the couch, then back to Kira. “There’s something you need to see,” he says.

 

* * *

 

“So do you have a twin you never told me about?”

Of all of the questions Kira has asked herself about her family over the years, she’s never wondered if she has a twin. It’s unnerving to think that she’s spent the last 20 years with an unknown identical twin somewhere in the world. “I honestly have no idea,” she says, staring at the woman asleep on her bed. “And if I did, how did she find me? Never mind how she got in here.”

“Should we wake her up?”

Kira is actually a little afraid to wake her up. What if she gives Kira some awful truths about their family? Was she abandoned by their parents, too? But before she can spiral too deeply into hypotheticals, the other Kira stirs. Kira and Ben exchange glances as the stranger blinks her eyes open and pushes herself up.

It’s hard to say whose eyes are wider: Kira’s or the stranger’s. It’s almost like looking into a mirror but not quite; the facial symmetry is the opposite of what Kira sees when she looks at her reflection, but she has a feeling that if she were to stand next to the stranger and look in a mirror, they would both be wearing the same dumbstruck expression.

Stranger than not-Kira’s reaction to her long-lost twin, however, is the way her jaw drops at the sight of her roommate. “Ben?” she says. “What the...did you kidnap me again?”

“Did I what? I’ve never seen you before in my life.” He looks at Kira. “Well, technically I have, since I live with your twin—“

“My what?”

“Me,” Kira says. “Your twin. Sorry, but what the fuck? How did you find me? I didn’t even know you existed.”

The woman frowns. “Twin? I don’t have a twin. Ben, what the kriff is going on? Where are we?”

Kriff? Kira has never heard that word in her life. It sounds like the sort of thing they make up in fantasy TV show to avoid swearing on TV. _Okay, let’s try something basic._ “What’s your name?” she asks the other Kira.

“Rey.”

“Rey what?” Kira has always wanted to know what her real last name was.

“Nothing,” Rey says. “Just Rey.”

“You must have a last name,” Kira says. Did Rey grow up in the system, like Kira did? If so, how come they were separated?

But Rey just shakes her head. “There wasn’t a need for last names on Jakku.”

“Jakku? Is that an island somewhere?”

Rey frowns. “It’s a planet in the Jakku system,” she says. “What planet are we on?”

Ben gives Kira a look as if to say _Your long-lost twin is crazy._ “We’re on Earth,” he says. “Where else would we be?”

“Earth? I’ve never heard of that. Or—wait a minute,” she says as something dawns on her. “This isn’t home.”

_No shit,_ thinks Kira.

“I must have jumped to another universe,” Rey says, mostly to herself. “That’s what that symbol meant. And you’re not Ben,” she adds, looking at him.

“No, I’m definitely Ben,” he says.

“No, I mean, you are, but you aren’t. Like she’s me, but she isn’t,” she says, pointing at Kira.

“Okay, let me get this straight. You’re Kira from another universe where interplanetary travel is a normal thing. You know a Ben in your universe. And somehow you magically ended up here?”

“Yes, exactly!” Rey says, standing up.

Kira turns to Ben. “Are we high?” she asks.

“Not as far as I know, no.”

“Because I feel like this has to be a hallucination.”

“Why would we be hallucinating the same thing?”

“I don’t know, I’ve never hallucinated before.”

“Hey,” Rey says. “I’m real, I promise.” She turns to Ben. “Does the name Kylo Ren mean anything to you?”

Kira snickers. “Your other self likes LARPing just as much as you do.” She teases him for it, but she secretly loves the way he gets so into his hobby. Plus, there’s the fact that he tends to walk around half-dressed while fixing his armor. Whether he realizes it or not, Ben Solo is _hot._ Kira spends more time than she really should thinking about how all of those muscles would feel if she were to reach out and run her hands over them.

Rey frowns. “I have no idea what that means, but Ben—my Ben—doesn’t go by his birth name anymore. Most people don’t even know that Ben Solo and Kylo Ren are the same person.” The way she says it tells Kira that Ben (Kylo?) is famous, and not for a good reason. Kira and Ben don’t always agree, but it sounds like Rey and Kylo are something much more complicated than roommates.

Also, the kidnapping thing is concerning. They’re going to have to discuss that.

Ben seems to be at a loss for how to respond to the implication that he exists in a universe where he goes primarily by his LARP character name, so Kira decides to ask Rey about herself. “Your name is really Rey? Not Kira?”

Rey bites her lip. “It’s possible that I was also named Kira, when I was a little girl,” she says cautiously. “Kira Rey. Or Rey Kira.”

Kira suddenly understands what she’s not saying. “Me too,” she says. “I don’t remember anything before the age of five. My parents…” She’s been seeing a therapist for two years, but it’s still difficult to say aloud.

Rey gets it, though. “Yeah,” she says softly. “Mine, too.” And it’s the weirdest thing, because Kira has cycled through a thousand different emotions about this, but this is one she’s never felt: compassion for her other self. And sympathy, because it’s upsetting to know that even in another universe where people live on spaceships, Rey’s parents did the same shitty thing that Kira’s did. Judging by the look in Rey’s eyes, she’s experiencing the same thing for Kira.

Ben clears his throat, making both Kira and Rey jump. They’d both forgotten he was there, it seems. “Why are you here?” he asks. Kira is about to elbow him for sounding so rude when he adds, “Not that you’re not welcome here.”

“I don’t know,” Rey admits. “I suppose the Force thinks I have something to learn from Kira. Maybe from you, too.”

“Do you know how to get home again?” Ben asks.

“I assume the same way I got here,” she says. “There was a diagram, and then a door appeared, and next thing I knew, I was waking up here.”

That’s a relief. Kira is curious about Rey—she finds she wants to know everything she can about her doppelganger, actually—but she’s not sure what she would do if she suddenly had a clone tailing her around, and Ben might not appreciate having another roommate move in without warning.

There’s an awkward pause as the three of them are lost in thought. The sound of two stomachs rumbling in unison breaks it, and Rey and Kira exchange grins. _If we’re the same person, do we like the same foods?_ Kira wonders. She’s hungry. Even before finding Rey in her bed, it’s been a long day, and this seems like the perfect excuse to order take-out. As if reading her (their?) mind, Ben says, “You said pizza. You want the usual?”

Kira looks away from Rey to smile at him. It took her and Ben a while to settle into a routine, but she’s glad he’s taking this situation and running with it. He’s not the best at dealing with the unexpected, and he hates it when she invites people over without warning him in advance. (To be fair, it’s pretty rare that she has people over. Finn, Poe, and Rose’s apartment is where their friend group usually congregates.) “I’ll order three pizzas,” he says, turning to leave.

Kira is grateful that he’s giving her and Rey a chance to talk, but the silence stretches as she and Rey both struggle to figure out where to start. Finally, Kira sinks into her desk chair, facing the bed. Rey sits as well, crossing her legs in front of her. “Does your Ben really go by the name Kylo Ren in public?” she finally asks.

She’s expecting Rey to laugh, but instead, she grimaces. “I’m assuming that Ben isn’t very well-known?”

Kira shakes her head. “His parents are famous, but he tries to stay out of it,” she says. “He used to work for this really awful company called First Order Productions, but he quit about a year ago and now he’s a freelance graphic designer.”

The name “First Order Productions” must mean something to Rey, because her eyes widen. “Was he the Supreme Leader?” she asks.

Kira can’t stop the laugh that escapes her, but Rey’s expression causes her to sober up pretty quickly. “Sorry,” she said. “That’s just…’Supreme Leader’ isn’t really a job title here. You’d have to ask Ben, but he doesn’t like to talk about it.”

Rey nods, considering. “I don’t think it’s all that important,” she says. “You two really are friends, though?”

“You and your Ben aren’t?” She doesn’t know if she could call Ben a _friend_ , exactly. For some reason, the word doesn’t really fit. He’s the best roommate she’s ever had, that’s for damn sure.

“We’re...it’s complicated.”

_Oh my god,_ Kira realizes. _She and her Ben are exes with a nasty breakup story._ She doesn’t mean to press Rey for details on what sounds to be an uncomfortable subject, but Rey gives them anyway. “We have this bond that connects us across time and space, but we’re leaders on opposite sides of a galaxy-wide war.” _Okay. A_ really _nasty breakup story, then._ “We’ve battled against each other and by each other’s side. The last time we saw each other, we didn’t part on the best of terms.” Her mouth tightens. “He tried to shoot my ship out of the sky after I rejected him when he asked me to rule by his side.”

Kira can’t imagine that. She almost wants to laugh; it’s like something out of _Star Trek._ But overreacting...well, that’s very _Ben_. She’s seen him break multiple phones from throwing them at the wall after a frustrating phone call. “Wow,” she says, for lack of better response. “Okay, so there’s you, and there’s another Ben. Who else do we have in common?”

 

* * *

 

Ben’s grateful for the rote interaction of ordering pizza. Having a “script” to stick to makes all of his conversations easier. He’s pretty sure that it makes him boring, but he likes the routines he’s established. There were a few long years where everything was constantly in chaos, but since leaving First Order Productions and starting his own freelance business, things have gone a little more smoothly for him.

Kira has been good for him, too. Okay, _fine_ , there’s the part where he’s hopelessly in love with her, but even that’s part of the routine at this point. Poe has commented on it on more than one occasion. _You need to tell her how you feel, dude._ Yeah, no. It’s not ideal, but Ben’s comfortable with his routine. He doesn’t need to shake that up by telling Kira how he feels about her.

But _two_ Kiras. That’s...that’s big. Frankly, he’s amazed that he’s holding it together as well as he is. Judging by the looks Rey kept giving him, there’s a long story behind her relationship with the other Ben, and it doesn’t have a happy ending. It’s eerie, seeing an exact replica of Kira. Does she have all of the same mannerisms as Kira? They share a lot of facial expressions, Ben noticed. (He’s spent a lot of time analyzing Kira’s expressions over the past couple of years that they’ve lived together.)

If they share the same mannerisms, he’s in trouble. Kira can be...distracting. He doubts she realizes it, and he’d die before letting her know things like how inexplicably attractive she looks wearing mismatched clothing on laundry day, or how happy it makes him when she cooks pancakes for him when they’ve both got the morning off.

Unhelpfully, his brain combines _two Kiras_ with _laundry day outfits_ and the result is a strange combination of erotic and distressing. He knows he’s been crossing a line for months now, fantasizing about Kira the way he does, but it’s definitely crossing another line to wonder if her doppelganger has the same set of three moles on her left shoulder, or if she has any tattoos like Kira does.

_STOP,_ he tells himself. _This is not going to go the way you think._

 


	3. Does not translate across universes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey, Kira, and Ben discuss music.

The past couple of days have been strange. There isn’t anywhere else to sleep (Rey had to choke back her laughter when she learned that Ben sliced the sofa in half with her lightsaber), so she’s been sleeping in Kira’s bed. “Don’t worry, I’ll keep my hands to myself,” Kira said when she suggested it the night Rey arrived. She’s also been borrowing Kira’s clothing, something that is no doubt stressing Ben out, since he can’t easily tell who he’s speaking to. 

She still can’t figure out how she managed to land in an alternate universe where she and Kylo are normal people not involved in a galactic civil war, much less a universe where they’re _roommates_. Roommates who don’t always get along, sure, but still roommates. It’s uncomfortably domestic watching them both cook dinner at the same time, completely in sync despite cooking totally different meals. “I’m assuming that you like the same foods I do,” Kira calls over her shoulder to Rey, who’s hovering awkwardly in the doorway. 

“I’ve lived off of ration packs for most of my life,” Rey says. “I can’t imagine you’ll feed me anything worse than that.” 

“Ration packs?” Ben asks. That’s possibly even stranger than seeing Kira. Rey has been stuck with them for two days, and it’s still unnerving to see this version of Kylo who isn’t volatile and angry all the time.

“Food that lasts a long time,” Rey explains. “It has the most basic nutritional content required by humans, and contains next to no flavor. It’s the only thing available on Jakku, and the Resistance doesn’t have the budget for anything fancier than that.” She’s told Kira and Ben a little bit about her life, but she keeps getting tripped up by things that she doesn’t know don’t exist in this universe.

Kira makes a noise of disgust. “I grew up with some pretty gross food, but at least I could get hot sauce easily and cheaply.” 

“Is that why there’s always so much sriracha in the fridge?” Ben asks.

“It makes everything better,” Kira says. “Eggs, mac and cheese, ramen, cake, you name it.”

They may as well be speaking a completely different language. Rey isn’t sure how to ask them what they mean without sounding completely ignorant, and the conversation lapses into silence as Ben and Kira finish cooking. “Sit down, Rey,” Kira says, waving at a place at the table that already has a plate of food on it. “Eat. Have as much of it as you like. And it’s okay if you don’t like the same foods as me,” she says with a wink.

Rey feels her face heat up. It’s still so bizarre, interacting with a different version of herself. They have the same exact body, most of the same mannerisms, similar backstories, and yet there are a few key differences that make Rey wonder if she’d have turned out the same, had her life gone a bit differently. Kira seems less guarded than Rey is, although she wonders if that’s only because Kira doesn’t feel the need to hide anything from this other version of herself.

Ben pulls out his phone and a moment later, music flares in the kitchen. Kira groans. “This isn’t one of your pretentious playlists, is it?”

“My speakers, my music.” 

Kira turns to Rey. “Is Kylo like this?” They’ve been referring to Rey’s Ben as Kylo; it’s less confusing that way. 

“Like what?”

“Pretentious.”

Rey thinks about it. Considering his upbringing—famous parents, famous uncle, strong in the Force from a young age— “We’ve never discussed music,” she says. “It’s not the most pressing of issues when you’re in the middle of a war. But I wouldn’t be surprised if his taste in music was, as you put it, pretentious.”

Kira grins at Ben. “See? Even in another universe, you’re you.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” he mutters, his eyes dropping down to stare at his plate.

“Not at all.” If Rey weren’t so familiar with her own face, she would miss the sincerity in Kira’s smile. Ben doesn’t respond. _Look up,_ she silently urges Ben. If this were her home universe, she’d be able to use the Force, but…

But nothing. Ben continues to eat his food in silence, and Kira’s smile fades. For all that Kira laughed at Rey’s explanation of her relationship with Kylo, there’s something similar here. Another parallel between them, Rey thinks.

She has to admit, the music Ben chose isn’t awful. She doesn’t know what the equivalent is in her universe, with the rapid tempo and smooth sounds of instruments she doesn’t know the name for. The song ends, and the next one begins. Unlike the previous one, Rey knows exactly what kind of music this is. “Oh, I love jizz,” she says, tapping her fingers on the table.

That simple statement provokes a _very_ strong reaction from her counterparts. Ben chokes on the water he’s drinking, and Kira says, “You _what_ now?”

“This music,” Rey says, pointing in the direction of the speaker. “Jizz.”

Ben is bright red in a way that Rey doesn’t think had anything to do with the water he just choked on. Kira’s mouth is hanging open in shock. “What?” Rey says, sinking back into her seat a little bit.

“That word…” Kira looks at Ben, who’s staring straight ahead at the wall like it’s the most interesting thing in the galaxy. She sighs, realizing that she’ll get no help from him. “It means something different here,” she finally says.

“I figured as much,” Rey says, trying not to let on how self-conscious she now feels. “What does it mean?”

Again, Kira looks at Ben, who’s now gripping his utensils so tightly his knuckles are white. What is she expecting him to say? And why is he so reluctant to say it? After a minute of this, Kira sighs loudly and rolls her eyes before pulling her phone out of her pocket. “It’ll be easier to just show you,” she says, typing something into the phone.

That gets Ben’s attention, and his head snaps to look at her. “Kira, you’re not actually going to—” He can’t even get the words out. What is so wrong with jizz in this universe?

“A picture’s worth a thousand words,” Kira says. “Or a video, as the case may be.” She presses a button, then turns her phone around to show Rey and Ben the screen.

It takes Rey a moment to realize what she’s looking at: a woman on her knees in front of a man, working his cock with her hands as she wraps her lips over the tip of it. Rey has been exposed to holoporn, but the filthy moans coming out of the screen are still jarring. “ _Fuck, baby, I’m about to—_ ” the man says before cutting himself off with a groan as he comes all over the woman’s mouth and neck. Rey finds herself shifting in her seat, hyperaware of the sudden dampness between her thighs. She’s never thought about doing _that,_ but now that the image of the man coming all over the woman is seared into her brain, she starts to wonder what it would be like to do that to someone.

Okay, fine. Not just someone. A specific someone whose doppelganger is seated right next to her, looking like he’s about to combust. What would Kylo do, if he was in her position? Would he be wondering what it would be like to have Rey’s mouth—

“That,” Kira says, pointing at the cum dripping down the woman’s chest, “is jizz.” She’s looking a little flushed as well. Rey can see the red creeping up her neck, and she wonders if Kira is thinking the same things Rey’s thinking. _Has she ever done that to someone?_ Rey wonders. _How does it taste? Does everyone like it like that, or do some people like it differently?_

Not that she’ll ask Kira that. Probably.

“Jesus, Kira,” Ben says, putting his face in his hands. “You can’t just whip out porn at the dinner table.”

“Sorry,” Kira says, not sounding very sorry. “I couldn’t think of a better way to explain it, and it would be mean to let her wander around referring to a subgenre of jazz as ‘jizz.’” Kira is trying very, very hard not to let on that she’s very interested in Ben’s reaction, but judging by the way she’s shifting in her seat, unintentionally mirroring Rey, she’s wondering where this sudden sexual tension is going to go. Did she do that on purpose, trying to push their boundaries?

Either way, that is not a conversation Rey is going to initiate with Ben in the room. “The food was good, Kira,” Rey says, wanting to take the focus off of him, “but I think I’m full. Can I help you clean up?”

Kira takes one last look at Ben, then nods at Rey. “Sure,” she says, standing up. “I’ll show you where everything goes.”

 

* * *

 

“I was not expecting dinner to take that turn,” Kira says later on, shutting the door behind her. She pulled Rey into her room after they’d silently put away the leftover food, Ben’s weird music (that Rey is never going to refer to as ‘jizz’ again) the only sound in the room. “Sorry. I got a little carried away. I didn’t think he was going to react like that.”

“He seemed embarrassed,” Rey says.

Kira sighs. “I was just trying to tease him,” she says. “I think he’s a bit of a prude. I know for a fact he likes that kind of porn, though.”

Rey stares at her. “How the hell do you know _that_?”

“Sometimes he forgets that his phone is still connected to his bluetooth speakers,” Kira says, smirking. “I don’t think he knows that I’ve heard anything before he disconnects it, but I hear enough. Wait a minute,” she says, giving Rey a look that makes her palms break out in a nervous sweat. “I thought you said you had some sort of psychic connection to Kylo?”

“I do,” Rey says, not liking where this conversation was headed. “And?”

“You’ve never…” Kira makes a gesture that Rey doesn’t know how to interpret. “You know.”

“No, I don’t.”

“You’ve never peeked?” Kira asks. “Or caught each other at an inopportune time?”

“I—no!” She isn’t going to mention that one time on Ahch-To. “We’re on opposing sides of a galactic war. We spend most of our time avoiding each other.”

“Oh,” Kira says, her face falling. “Right. Sorry.” She flops down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. “Goddamnit,” she says. “Now I’m thinking about my roommate’s cock.”

Rey gathers as much from the flush that has yet to fade from Kira’s neck and chest. “I’m not sure you need to be telling me that.”

“It’s my own damn fault,” Kira says, ignoring Rey. “I haven’t gotten laid in ages.”

Rey has never heard that phrase before, but the meaning is clear. “Why not?” she asks as she sits down on the bed next to Kira. “You’re not on the run from an evil fascist organization. Surely you have time to go out and ‘get laid.’”

Kira gives a half shrug, wrinkling the sheets slightly. “I don’t know,” she says. “I don’t like the thought of bringing someone here. It’d be weird. Ben never has anyone over, either. Not that he goes out often. Only when I or Finn drag him out. And he always comes home alone.” She pauses. “I mean, he comes home with me, but not _with_ me. You know?” Her tone is wistful, like it’s something she’s thought about before on more than one occasion.

Rey processes that as she lays back on the bed next to Kira. “Oh,” she says. Is Kira aware of what’s happening here?

Kira shifts suddenly to lay on her side, facing Rey. “Seriously,” she says as she props her head up on her elbow. “You and your Ben, you never…?”

“No.” She tries to say it as firmly as possible, but she’s pretty sure that Kira hears the slight waver in her voice.

“But you want to,” Kira whispers.

Rey turns over to face Kira, surprised to realize how closely they’re laying. She can count the freckles on her doppelganger’s face if she wants to. “It doesn’t matter,” Rey says. “We’re on—”

“Opposite sides of a galactic war, yes, you’ve said.”

“And now I’m stuck here for Force knows how long.”

“Hey,” Kira says, tucking a strand of Rey’s hair behind her ear. “You’re welcome to stay here as long as you need. I like having you here. It’s fascinating, meeting another version of myself.”

The last time someone touched Rey so tenderly was on Ahch-To, and that’s not something she wants to think about right now. Not while she’s trapped in a strange parallel universe with a snarkier, less reserved version of herself because she royally karked up a Force experiment. A version of herself who is now tracing her fingers lightly over the scar on Rey’s upper arm. “What happened here?” Kira asks quietly.

“A fight.”

“Must have been some fight,” Kira murmurs.

Rey smiles despite herself. “You could say that.”

“Tell me about it.” Her fingers haven’t stopped their movements, making Rey shiver despite the warmth of the room.

“It doesn’t have a happy ending,” Rey murmurs, closing her eyes. When Kira doesn’t respond, she adds, “Ben—Kylo—was working for someone very powerful and very evil. Everyone else had given up on him, but we were bonded, so we were able to communicate across time and space, and I knew that he still had good in him.”

“Sounds intimate.”

Rey has never thought of it in those terms, but Kira’s right. “I went to him, on the ship that he and the leadership of the First Order, including his mentor, were on. I thought I could convince him to come back with me, to turn the tide of the war.” She takes a deep breath, trying to blink back tears. “There was a moment when we...well, it doesn’t matter.”

“Why not?”

“He killed his mentor to save me, then we took down the entire Praetorian Guard together. That’s how I got the scar. But afterwards…” This is the painful part. “We had a fight and broke my lightsaber, which actually was sort of his because it was his grandfather’s, we both got knocked out, I woke up first, and I ran.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah.” She didn’t realize she started crying until she feels Kira’s lips press against her cheek. Her eyes snap open to look into Kira’s, who’s giving her a cautious look. “What are you doing?” she whispers.

“Not sure, to be honest,” Kira says, wiping Rey’s tears away. “You look like you need a distraction. I think we both do.”

_Surely she’s not suggesting what I think she’s suggesting?_ “Isn’t that a little, I don’t know, weird?”

“We’re the same person. And I _know_ you liked what you saw in that video. I know your tells. They’re the same as mine.”

“I’m pretty sure that neither of us has the equipment to perform that particular sex act.”

“No, but there are plenty of other things we can do.”

Rey runs through her (admittedly limited) knowledge of sex acts, but she isn’t completely sure what Kira is referring to. She does know where to start, however. “Kiss me,” she breathes.

And Kira does just that.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not gonna lie, this chapter was 98% an excuse to make a joke about the fact that jizz really is the name of a musical genre in the GFFA. god bless the person who wrote [the Wookieepedia article about it](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Jizz) because i certainly do not have the maturity to not comment on it. clearly.


	4. Shh, he’s going to hear us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kira and Rey find out just how _distracting_ they can be to each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I keep making the mistake of saying “i can’t possibly write anything weirder than anything i’ve already written” and then next thing I know I’m writing smut about someone having sex with another version of herself.
> 
> That is to say: this is pure F/F smut so if that’s not your thing, you may want to skip this chapter. I promise Ben comes back in the next one.

Rey has had a surprising amount of experience kissing, all things considered. In between supply runs for the Resistance, she discovered that a number of people like to play a game called “Spin the bottle” on nights off. She’s always felt that it’s a little juvenile, but it helps people burn off steam a little bit. And it’s kind of fun, even though Rey always feels like there’s someone else she’d rather be kissing. Point being, Rey has shared a fair number of kisses in the past. 

Kissing Kira is nothing like those.

For one, she seems just as curious about this as Rey is. Kira has implied that she’s had sex with at least a couple of different partners, which means that she knows what she’s doing. And yet, there’s a little caution that she’s exercising with Rey. Maybe she’s afraid that Rey is going to suddenly back off because this is kriffing _weird,_ she’s in an alternate universe making out with herself. But then Kira slides her hands up under the hem of Rey’s shirt—a shirt she borrowed from Kira—and Rey stops caring about how weird this is.

No, that’s not quite right. Rey decides that she _likes_ how weird this is. Judging from the way Kira deepens the kiss, she does, too.

Rey decides that her best course of action is to follow Kira’s lead, so she slides her hands up to run them along the warm skin of Kira’s back. Like Rey, Kira is slender and wiry. She’s probably stronger than she looks; Rey wonders if people underestimate Kira’s strength as often as they underestimate hers.

“I’m going to be honest,” Kira murmurs as she slides Rey’s shirt up over her ribcage, “I’ve been dying to get you naked so that I can know what I look like naked.”

It’s an incredibly self-centered statement, but Rey finds it amusing. And now that Kira has mentioned it, Rey wants the same thing. “What are you waiting for?” she says, sitting up to pull her shirt off.

Kira grins. “Oh, I like you.” The grin is wiped off of her face a moment later as she gets a good look at Rey. “Oh my god,” she murmurs. “Rey, we’re _hot._ ”

“You sound surprised,” Rey says, although she’s surprised as well. She hasn’t spent much time thinking about her own physical attractiveness; she’s always had more pressing concerns. The way that her counterpart is looking at her is equal parts reassuring, flattering, and arousing.

“You need to see this,” Kira says, pulling her own shirt off.

Unlike Rey, she’s wearing something else under her shirt. A _bra_ , Kira had called it when she’d gone through her dresser, looking for clothes for Rey. Neither of them is willing to share undergarments, although Rey has been wondering about the different styles. She’s sure that somewhere in her universe, clothes like that exist. Probably someplace rich, like Coruscant or Chandrila. She briefly wonders if Kylo would like to see her in something like that, but she squashes the thought quickly. She doesn’t really want to think about him right now. Not while Kira is sitting next to her, wearing a garment that conceals as much as it shows. Even though Rey knows how her breasts look, there’s something enticing about the way the black lace covers Kira. “Wow,” Rey breathes. “I think I need one of these.” 

Kira laughs, but she’s blushing. “You can travel through an entire galaxy, but you’ve never seen lingerie before?”

“I grew up on a desert wasteland and am now living in a war.” The reminder causes Kira’s grin to falter a little bit. Rey doesn’t want to ruin the mood, so she changes the subject. “Can I touch you?”

“So polite,” Kira murmurs, kissing Rey again. She takes Rey’s hands and places them on her waist, which Rey takes as a yes. Her fingers slide up over Kira’s ribs until they hit the bottom of the bra. The lace is softer than it looks, and Kira’s breath hitches as Rey’s thumbs brush her nipples. Encouraged, she does it again. This isn’t something she’s done to herself, but seeing how much Kira likes it makes her wonder if she’s been missing out.

Kira hums, then pulls away a little bit to undo the latch in the back of the bra. When it falls away, Rey understands Kira’s earlier reaction. “Wow,” she breathes. “Kira, we even have the same beauty mark on the underside of our left breast.” She touches Kira’s mark, as if for emphasis.

“I know,” Kira says. “Trippy, right?”

Rey takes that to mean _weird._ “Trippy,” she agrees. There’s something different on their bodies, though. “What do these mean?” she says, tracing her fingers down the marks on Kira’s chest. They look like little dots of various sizes, trailing from Kira’s right shoulder down between her breasts, forming a pattern that Rey doesn’t recognize.

“The tattoos?” Kira says, looking down. “They’re stars, actually.”

“A map?”

Kira laughs. “Yeah, I guess they would look like a map to you,” she says. “Not a map. Not even a constellation. Just stars.”

“They’re pretty. Does everyone get them?” She’s spent a lot of the last two days watching television to pass the time while Kira and Ben are at work. Even though they all speak the same language, the writing system is different, rendering Rey illiterate. She hasn’t seen any TV characters with marks like Kira’s, but most of them don’t remove their shirts anyway.

“No, not everyone,” Kira says. “You don’t have any tattoos?” 

“No tattoos.” _Just scars,_ she adds silently. She’s still touching Kira’s chest, although now that her fingers have reached the end of Kira’s non-star map, they’ve stilled. Rey likes this careful exploration of their bodies, but she’s not sure how to say that she wants more.

The benefit of being with another version of yourself, however, is that you both know how to each each other’s cues. They’re the same, after all. “Lie back,” Kira says, nudging Rey’s shoulder. They rearrange themselves so that Kira is leaning over Rey, her knees on either side of Rey’s hips. Rey slides her hands up to settle on Kira’s waist, and Kira leans over her, kissing her again as she balances on her forearms on either side of Rey’s head.

Rey has never kissed like this before, lying underneath someone. Kira shifts, settling down in a way that feels _very_ pleasant against Rey’s skin. Rey barely hesitates when she wraps her arms around Kira’s hips, trying to shift their bodies to repeat the motion.

Kira lets out a sound that sounds halfway between a laugh and a moan, like she’s amused by Rey’s actions. “A little impatient, aren’t we?” she murmurs. “Have you ever done this before?”

“No. Have you?”

“A couple of times.” Rey’s curious about the details, but Kira doesn’t elaborate. “Is your neck as sensitive as mine, I wonder?”

A moment later, Rey finds out as Kira presses an open-mouthed kiss on her pulse point. “Kriff, that feels good,” she says. She curses again as Kira sucks at the skin, the combination of pleasure and pain going straight to her core.

“Guess that answers that question,” Kira murmurs, pressing another kiss below Rey’s jaw. She kisses Rey again just under her ear, and then freezes suddenly.

“Kira?” Rey says, suddenly afraid that she’s done something wrong.

Kira does something odd then. She presses her nose into Rey’s hair and inhales deeply. “Did you use Ben’s shampoo?” she asks. “You smell like him.”

Rey’s not sure what she used in the fresher earlier. “Is that okay?”

“Mmhm.” Kira sounds pleased. One of the weirder aspects of this, Rey realizes, is that they’re both very conscious of the fact that there’s someone else they both want to be with. It’s almost like Ben and Kylo are phantom participants. If Kylo had come with her, would he and Ben do the same thing Kira and Rey are doing right now?

_Kriff._ Rey has never given much thought to group sex, but she is unbelievably aroused by the thought of the four of them together.

“What are you thinking right now?” Kira’s voice brings Rey back to the present. She’s still sniffing Rey’s hair—no, wait. She’s nibbling Rey’s ear which, like the neck kisses, feels _amazing_.

“What if Kylo had come with me to your universe?”

She doesn’t even need to finish the thought; the look in Kira’s eyes say that she knows exactly what Rey’s thinking. “Bring him with you next time and we’ll find out.”

“Deal.” And then words fail her as Kira abandons Rey’s ear in favor of her breasts, and _holy stars_ it feels incredible when she wraps her lips around Rey’s nipple. Her hand is working at her other breast, her thumb rubbing circles around the sensitive skin of her nipple. “Kriff, Kira. Why have I never done this before?”

“I don’t think your tongue is long enough to do this to yourself.” The words are muffled, and Rey giggles. Actually _giggles._ She wants to make Kira feel as good as she does right now, but before she can figure out how to express that, Kira asks, “You wanna know what else I can do with my tongue?”

_The video._ Rey finds that she’s perfectly content to leave that particular stone unturned at the moment, and when Kira hooks her fingers into the waistband of Rey’s leggings, she doesn’t stop her double from pulling them off. The sight of her own face peeking up at her from where Kira is kneeling between Rey’s legs is bizarre, but Rey doesn’t get a chance to think too much about it before Kira gently nips at Rey’s inner thigh. It doesn’t hurt, exactly, but it’s not particularly erotic. “Kira, what the kriff?”

Kira grins. “I don’t know why I just did that,” she admits. “I don’t like having that done to me, either.” Rey briefly wonders if she’s having second thoughts, but she murmurs something Rey doesn’t quite catch before licking a slow, hot stripe up the seam of Rey’s cunt. She lets out a garbled curse, which Kira seems to take as encouragement, because she does it again. She stops suddenly to ask Rey, “Hey, do you think we taste the same?”

“What is this, some kind of science experiment?”

“A _sexy_ science experiment.”

Rey has half a mind to joke _We should ask Ben to come be our lab assistant,_ but she doesn’t think that would go over well at the moment. “As your test subject, I suggest you continue,” she says instead.

Kira laughs, but she doesn’t argue, and it’s not long before Rey can feel tension building deep in her core, the familiar tension taking on a new pitch as Kira’s lips and tongue take her to new heights. A few minutes later, as if sensing that Rey can handle a little more, Kira slides a finger inside of Rey. It’s nothing she hasn’t done to herself before—literally; they have the same fingers—but Rey has _definitely_ never been able to make herself feel like this. A small part of her thinks that she should take notes from Kira before she goes home, but most of her is too busy enjoying it. “Kriff, Kira,” she moans, her fingers tangling in the bedsheets. (She’s pretty sure it’s considered rude to just grab someone’s hair during oral sex.)

Rey must have said that louder than she realized, because Kira pauses to say, “Dude, Ben’s bedroom is right on the other side of that wall. He’s going to hear us if you get any louder.” It’s unclear how Kira feels about the prospect of her roommate listening to her and her alternate universe self have sex. Rey isn’t planning on being loud enough for the whole building to hear, but if Ben just so _happens_ to know what they’re doing, well…

Kira doesn’t seem to mind, and it’s not much longer until Rey is cursing and moaning gibberish in four languages as she comes. She knows exactly how to work Rey through the aftershocks, and she crawls back up to lay next to Rey, pressing kisses into Rey’s sweaty skin. “Holy stars,” Rey says once she catches her breath. “Kira, that was _amazing._ ”

She likes the pleased little smile that her doppelganger gives her. “That was fun,” Kira agrees.

Kira doesn’t seem like she’s going to ask, but Rey wants to make Kira feel as good as she feels right now. “Can I try?”

“Yes, _please,_ ” Kira says, standing up to kick off her shorts. “God, that was so hot, Rey. I can’t believe how into this I am.” Her skin is just as flushed as Rey’s is, and even if she hadn’t said anything, it would have been obvious by the arousal glistening on her thighs.

Rey is fascinated by it. It’s like she’s able to see herself from another angle, and as curious as she is to know how Kira tastes, she wants to take time exploring her body. Kira doesn’t seem to mind; she makes all sorts of encouraging noises and words, content to let Rey do whatever she wants. After all, this isn’t an opportunity that either of them will ever have again, in all likelihood. 

But she doesn’t want to take all night, and as she moves further down Kira’s body, she tangles her fingers in Rey’s hair gently. Rey finds that she doesn’t mind it; Kira isn’t pulling her hair, and it feels nice. Almost as if she’s giving Kira something to hold on to. Rey’s never been the thing for someone to hold on to, and she likes it.

It also gives her another way to know if she’s doing something that Kira likes, because when she finally trails kisses down Kira’s hips and between her thighs, she’s greeted with a gentle tug. “Yes, Rey, just like that,” she gasps as Rey moves her tongue, trying to recreate what Kira just did to her.

Rey feels like she’s less sure about this than Kira was, but it’s not too difficult to figure out what Kira likes. There’s a pleasant sort of glowing feeling she’s getting, and she wonders for a split second what this looks like in the Force. There’s no way there isn’t some sort of energy signature radiating from this bedroom right now.

“Oh my god, Rey,” Kira moans. “Don’t stop, please don’t stop, I’m so close, I—” Nothing could make Rey stop right now, not when she’s got a squirming, moaning Kira lying beneath her on the bed. She likes the noises she’s making, and when Kira comes, Rey knows she’s going to remember this moment for a long time.

After, they’re both lying on Kira’s bed, Kira’s arm slung over Rey’s waist. Sleeping in the same bed has been mostly uneventful, if not a bit restless—they’re both very light sleepers who are unused to sharing a bed—but it hasn’t felt intimate. Not like this moment does. Rey is about to ask Kira what she’s thinking, when Kira bursts out laughing. “What is it?” she asks, trying to figure out what the joke could possibly be.

Kira’s laughing too hard for a couple of minutes, but finally, she calms down enough to say, “Rey. We just engaged in some next-level masturbation. I think that deserves a high-five.”

“We what?”

“What else do you call it when you have sex with yourself?”

Okay, she has to admit. When Kira puts it like that, it’s pretty funny. “As far as first sexual experiences go, this is hard to beat,” Rey says, laughing along with her.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah I still don't have any explanation for this fic or this oddly-specific kink but if you made it this far, thank you for reading.


	5. Practice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Ben get to know each other a little better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> @ all of you who have left kudos, comments, bookmarks, and subscriptions: thank you for supporting this ridiculousness.

The next morning is weird. Not because Kira feels strange about what she and Rey did last night, but because she can’t tell if Ben knows or not. Maybe he didn’t hear them. Maybe he had headphones in. Maybe he wasn’t even in his room when Rey was moaning Kira’s name. Maybe.

She and Rey talked about it when they woke up; they both agreed that they had fun and would be willing to do it again, although Rey keeps insisting that “this can’t possibly be why the Force sent me here.” There’s no time now, however; Kira can’t take another day off from work, so she’s rushing to get ready while Rey hovers awkwardly, unsure of what she should do. “I’d bring you with me, but that’s going to invite a lot of questions that I don’t know how to answer,” Kira says by way of apology.

“It’s fine,” Rey says, shrugging. “I get it. I’d have to hide you, too, if you appeared in my universe.”

“Having a stowaway on a spaceship seems unsafe.”

“You’d be safe on the _Millennium Falcon._ ” She pauses as something occurs to her. “Well, actually, it’s constantly falling apart, and—What’s so funny?”

“Your ship is named the _Millennium Falcon?_ ” That’s the nickname Han has for the car he’s been driving around for the past thirty years.

“Let me guess,” Rey says. “Another parallel?”

“Ben’s dad’s car,” Kira says.

“Kylo’s dad’s ship.” There’s something brittle in Rey’s expression, but Kira doesn’t know how to ask about it. “It’s okay,” Rey says. “Go to work. I’ll be fine here. I think I know how to use the television now.” Kira and Ben showed her how to use Netflix yesterday. Rey can’t read any of the movie descriptions because she doesn’t know the Latin alphabet, but she says she can remember how to press a few buttons.

“I think Ben will be around today,” Kira says. “Go bother him if you get bored.” She feels oddly protective about Rey. It doesn’t make sense, because Rey lives in the middle of a galactic-scale war so she obviously can take care of herself, but Kira’s worried about leaving her alone all day.

“Kira, I’ll be fine.” Rey surprises her by giving Kira a quick kiss on the cheek. Neither of them is used to that sort of casual physical affection, and they both sport identical blushes when Rey steps back. “Go to work.”

“Call me—make Ben call me—if you need anything.”

It’s only when she catches sight of Rey’s expression that Kira realizes what she’s feeling: cared for. It’s sad that the only connection Kira has ever truly felt with someone else comes from a version of herself from an alternate universe, but that’s what it is. Cared for.

 

* * *

 

“You must be bored here,” Ben says when he walks into the living room to see Rey staring at the TV, trying to pick something to watch based solely on the cover image on Netflix. Yesterday she watched a show called _Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey_. It’s entertaining to learn about space on a world where beings haven’t mastered interplanetary travel yet. Rey doubts that’s the lesson that the Force sent her here to learn, either, but it’s fun all the same.

She shrugs. “I don’t want to get locked out.” She’s curious about the outside world, but she’s worried that someone will recognize her. She doesn’t know how to be Kira. She only knows how to be Rey.

“It’s nice out today,” Ben says. He sounds a little hesitant, and she wonders if he’s nervous around her. From what she can tell, he’s comfortable around Kira, but Rey knows that she might just be projecting what she wants from Kylo onto Ben and Kira’s relationship. “Do you want to go out for coffee?”

If she goes out with Ben and they run into someone who knows Kira, he can probably help cover for her. She finds that she wants to spend more time with Ben, if only so that she can look for parallels between him and Kylo. She and Kira have discovered plenty between themselves, but Rey doesn’t feel like she’s learned the lesson the Force is trying to teach her by bringing her here yet. Maybe it’s something she has to learn from Ben instead of Kira. “That sounds nice,” she says, pushing herself to her feet. He gives her a little half smile, then leads her out into the world outside of the apartment.

It’s summertime here, and the weather is warm and sunny. There’s a road with wheeled transports moving in opposite directions, and another row of buildings on the other side of it. She follows Ben down the sidewalk, unable to resist the urge to gawk at the city around them. When she looks back at him, he’s wearing an odd little half-smile, like he’s amused by her behavior. She doesn’t have it in her to feel self-conscious about it; he’d do the same if he were in her position.

The walk to the coffee shop isn’t too long, and Ben is happy to answer all of Rey’s questions as they go. He stops in front of a little shop with a couple of tables in front of it. “This is Kira’s favorite cafe,” he says quietly. “Sit down. I’ll order for you. I know what she usually gets.”

Rey eyes the small tables, then sits down at a small one with two empty chairs that gives her a view of the street. It’s strange to be in a city where the only sentient species is human. She’s never been someplace with so little diversity.

Ben comes back out a few minutes later carrying two cups and a small bag. He hands her one of the cups and sits down next to her. “It’s called an iced chai latte,” he says. “And there’s a blueberry muffin in the bag.”

The drink is cold and sweet, with a slightly spicy flavor. It’s delicious, and so is the blueberry muffin. “Thank you,” she says in between bites.

He’s smiling at her. She can tell that he wants to ask her something, and she’s afraid that he’s going to ask about Kylo. Kira implied that Ben hasn’t always been a good person, but he’s never killed his father. “What’s it like?” he asks in a low voice, leaning in so that she can hear him. “Being in an alternate universe.”

Rey doesn’t even know where to start with that question. “Really kriffing weird,” she says quietly. “I don’t know which is weirder, seeing another version of myself, or seeing another version of my—of Kylo.”

“What’s he to you?” Ben asks. “Not roommates, I gather.”

She’s not sure how to explain her relationship with Kylo to this other, tamer version of him. Certainly not friends, but _enemies_ isn’t quite right, either. “It’s complicated,” she settles on.

Ben snorts. “I’m sure there’s a story behind that.” He knows bits and pieces of it, but she hasn’t told him nearly as much as she’s told Kira.

She’s saved from having to respond by a woman greeting Ben from the sidewalk. “Hey, Bazine,” he says. Rey prays that Bazine doesn’t know Kira well enough to notice that she’s not herself right now.

“Good to see you, Kira,” she says. _Okay,_ Rey thinks. _Maybe she does know Kira, after all._ There’s something about the way that Rey and Ben are seated that makes her smirk. “Glad to see he finally got his shit together and asked you out.”

“That’s not—we—I—” Ben stammers, his face and ears turning bright red. He gestures wildly, refusing to look at Rey.

“Oh,” Bazine says, her eyes widening. “Whoops. Sorry to assume.” She doesn’t sound sorry, though, and Rey wonders if she did that on purpose to stir up conflict between Kira and Ben. “You two just look so cozy together.”

“We’re not—” Ben says, still at a loss for words. Rey is silent, unsure of the best way to rescue him as she realizes what his flustered stammering means. Ben likes Kira, maybe even loves her. Kira has no idea, and she feels something for him, even if she hasn’t fully admitted it. And considering all the parallels between Rey’s life and Kira’s…

What does that mean for Rey and Kylo?

Rey is still deep in thought when Bazine leaves. Ben is red-faced, and he refuses to look at her. The silence stretches on, and Rey thinks that she’d rather have to explain Kylo to Ben than endure more of this awkwardness. They finish their drinks, then leave the cafe. They’re halfway back to the apartment when Ben finally breaks the silence. “Please don’t tell Kira about that.”

“I wasn’t going to,” Rey says cautiously.

“It’s just.” Ben’s running his hands through his hair, making Rey wonder if Kylo has a similar nervous habit. (If he ever did, he probably broke the habit from wearing a helmet full-time for so long.) “Things are fine the way they are now, you know? It’s a terrible idea to start dating your roommate, and anyway, Kira doesn’t feel the same way about me.”

_You’d be surprised,_ Rey thinks. She’s not going to say that, though. Kira’s relationship is none of her concern.

...except that it sort of is, because Rey is another Kira, and she has her own Ben. “Please say something,” he says, looking lost.

“I get it, I think.” She hesitates before adding, “Kylo and I have a complicated relationship. If we weren’t leaders on opposite sides of a war, maybe we would...I don’t know.”

Ben looks relieved. “Really?”

“You have no idea how strange it is, to see a you who’s not you.” It feels good to finally admit it, and she can’t help adding, “It’s so frustrating. We have a bond connecting us. Sometimes we catch glimpses of each other, even though we’re on opposite ends of the galaxy. There was a time when we almost…” She trails off, hoping that he understands where she’s going.

“But you didn’t?”

“We were in a throne room surrounded by the bodies of the Supreme Leader and the guards we’d just killed together, and I was trying to save what was left of the Resistance fleet. The circumstances were a little less than ideal.”

He lets out a low whistle. “Okay, I’ll give you that.”

Rey doesn’t mean to say it, but the words slip out before she can stop them. “You wouldn’t believe the dreams I’ve had about you— _him_ —since.” She worries for a brief second that he’s going to ask her to elaborate, but he’s already turning away, his face redder than if he’d spent all day in the Jakku sun.

 

* * *

 

Ben still feels a strange tension between him and Rey when they return to the apartment. He thinks it’s because they’ve both admitted that they have feelings for each others’ counterparts. That, and the lingering knowledge that he’s pretty sure he heard Rey and Kira having sex last night. He’s pretty sure he’s never been so hard in his life, but he refuses to cross that line, no matter how badly he wants to. (He did, however, cross the line when he thought about how Kira already had that video queued up on her phone. He’s too weak to turn down the temptation of thinking about her porn-watching preferences and habits.)

He disappears into his room, hoping to use work as a distraction, leaving Rey to her own devices. She probably needs space to process their conversation, too. When he makes his way into the kitchen a couple of hours later, Rey is sitting on the counter, drinking a glass of water. “So I’ve been thinking,” she says as he’s reaching for a glass on the shelf next to her.

“About?”

“You want Kira.” He’s about to open his mouth to protest, but she adds, “And I want Kylo.”

“We’ve established that.” Where is she going with this?

“We could…” She’s turning pink, just like Kira does when she’s embarrassed about something. “Kiss. And then we’d know what it was like.”

She has a point. If he and Kylo are the same, and Rey and Kira are the same, it would be...well, not the _same_ , but close enough. Rey has already promised that she’s not going to say anything to Kira. Maybe this will be a good way for him to get it out of his system.

There’s just one problem. “I’ve, uh,” he says, looking down at the countertop. “I’ve never really done this before.” That’s a large part of the reason why he hasn’t said anything to Kira. He doesn’t want to embarrass himself or disappoint her with his inexperience.

He can’t see Rey’s expression, but her tone is kind when she says, “That’s okay. It’ll be like practice. For, you know, if the real thing actually happens. I can show you what Kira likes.” She shifts, scooting just a tiny bit closer to him so that her thigh is now touching the hand that’s resting on the countertop. “She never has to know. Kylo never has to know. Just us."

He finally looks up to meet Rey’s eyes. His gaze flickers down to her lips for a moment. “Okay,” he says. “Yeah. Just us.” Kira won’t be home from work for a few more hours, and he can’t imagine that he and Rey will make out for that long, anyway. “So how do we…?”

“Come here,” she says, gently placing her hand on his cheek. They both lean in, and then they’re kissing. The first kiss is hesitant, like they’re both afraid that the other is going to back out at the last moment. But they don’t, and their next kiss is a lot more certain. Rey seems to know what she’s doing, so Ben is happy to let her take the lead. One of her hands is still cupping his cheek, but the other is now slung around his neck, her fingers tangling in his hair. He isn’t sure what to do with his hands, so he leaves them on the counter, on either side of Rey’s hips. They’ve shifted so that he’s standing between her knees, their bodies close but not quite touching.

This is...well, it’s not exactly what he wants, but it’s nice all the same. More than nice, actually. Rey deepens the kiss, and he works up the courage to place his hands on her thighs. She makes a noise that he takes as a good sign, pulling him closer. He doesn’t mind that they’re both thinking of someone else; it feels good regardless. Rey pulls back a little bit to whisper, “Let me show you something Kira likes.”

“Something she showed you last night?” He mentally curses as he realizes what he just let slip.

He expects Rey to shove him away, but she surprises him by flashing him a very Kira-like smirk. “We couldn’t tell if you heard that or not,” she admits.

“Oh, I heard.” He thinks she’s going to say something in return, but her lips are too busy trailing kisses down his neck. How has he never known how sensitive the skin there is? He’s almost embarrassed by the moan he lets out. Luckily, Rey seems to find that encouraging, and she closes the distance between their bodies as she continues her exploration with her lips and tongue on Ben’s neck. He’s hard now, something that Rey doesn’t seem to have a problem with, judging by the way she’s wrapped her legs around his hips. He’s still gripping her thighs, but his hands have slid higher, his thumbs tracing little circles on the insides of her thighs. She’s wearing a pair of Kira’s leggings, and he can feel how muscular she is. He wonders if Kira would feel the same way.

It’s remarkably easy to keep doing this, and Ben wonders if this is actually going to lead to anything other than making out in the kitchen. He’s starting to feel like he’d be okay with that. Yeah, he’d rather be with Kira, but then again, Rey would rather be with Kylo, so they’re on even footing.

Rey seems to be satisfied with Ben’s neck for the time being, and she captures his lips with hers again, sliding her hands down his chest. There’s a fluttering in his stomach, almost like he’s being tickled. He’s just starting to wonder if she’s going to reach for the button on his jeans when he hears Kira say, “Guys, what the fuck?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well OBVIOUSLY that cliffhanger was gonna happen.
> 
> What is [_Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey_](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cosmos:_A_Spacetime_Odyssey)?


	6. Don’t stop on my account

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is _this_ the lesson Rey was sent here to learn?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here, have a threesome with selfcest and lots of enthusiastic consent

It’s like an out-of-body experience, watching Rey kiss Ben. And they’re not just kissing; they’re practically dry humping on the kitchen counter _._ Kira doesn’t miss the way that Rey’s hands are almost reaching for Ben’s jeans or the way his hands are gripping her thighs. They both look horrified at the sight of Kira standing in the entryway to the kitchen.

“I thought you were at work,” Ben says. Neither he nor Rey have let go of each other. Kira has to admit, she doesn’t completely hate the sight of them together. She’s experiencing a strange combination of confusion and arousal. This is something she never expected...although she probably should have, given what she and Rey have done, and given what she knows about Rey and Kylo.

“Rose picked up the second half of my shift,” she says, still staring at the two of them. “And. Um.” She doesn’t necessarily want them to stop, but she doesn’t want them to continue without her around.

What does it mean that Ben and Rey are kissing? Kira is pretty sure that Rey is only thinking about Kylo. And if Rey is thinking about Kylo when kissing Ben, does that mean that Ben is thinking about Kira when he’s kissing Rey?

If Ben wants her as badly as she wants him, this changes _everything_ for them.

He finally lets to of Rey and steps back, red-faced and apologetic. Rey is blushing as well, but she looks more amused than apologetic. “No, wait,” Kira says, unable to believe that the words are coming out of her mouth. “Don’t stop on my account.”

Ben frowns, like he doesn’t understand her meaning, but Rey just grins. She must know exactly what Kira’s thinking. She’s said that she and Kylo have some sort of special psychic bond because of the Force thing that seems to rule their universe; Kira is starting to wonder if she and Rey share some sort of psychic bond as well.

Or maybe it’s just that they’re literally the same person.

Kira isn’t even aware that she’s moving until she’s standing next to them. She and Rey share a glance before she turns to Ben and tugs at the collar of his shirt, pulling him in for a kiss. It’s a little awkward at first, causing her to panic that she’s completely miscalculated, but after a moment she realizes that he’s just surprised. So is she, to be honest.

He tentatively cups her face with one hand, and a moment later, Kira feels the press of Rey’s lips on her neck, leaving slow, open-mouthed kisses in just the way that Kira likes. In response, she slides her hand up Rey’s thigh until her fingers are slipping underneath the hem of her shirt to skirt over her waist. Someone lets out a small moan; Kira’s not completely sure who. Her, maybe. The sensation of Ben’s tongue hesitantly sliding over hers as their kiss deepens combined with the feeling of Rey’s tongue soothing the bite she just gave to Kira’s pulse point is nothing like she’s ever experienced, and Kira wonders what else they could all experience from this. Judging from the hesitancy she’s getting from both of them, she’s going to have to take the lead on this. Kira’s had other partners, but she’s never had a threesome before, so even though she’s thought about it on more than a few occasions, she doesn’t have _actual_ experience with it.

Oh well. She’s definitely not opposed to taking charge right now. “Bedroom?” she murmurs between kisses.

Ben and Rey both freeze. Kira wonders if she’s taking this too fast. “We don’t have to, if you’re not comfortable with it,” she rapidly backtracks. “I don’t want any of us to do something we don’t want to do.”

There’s a slight pause before Rey says, “I’m in.”

A moment later, Ben nods. “We can go to my room,” he says hesitantly. “If you want.” Seeing as his bed is bigger than Kira’s, that seems like the better choice, and she leads both of them into Ben’s room. There’s a moment when they pause in the doorway, like they’re all afraid that someone else will back out. No one changes their mind; in fact, Rey and Ben kiss again, giving Kira another opportunity to take in the sight of them. It’s still bizarre—and bizarrely _erotic_.

Kira pulls off her shirt, wishing she’d worn something a little sexier than the plan black sports bra she’s been wearing all day. Of course, if she’d known that her day was going to involve a threesome with her roommate and her double from another universe, she would have been more prepared for this. (More distracted, as well. As it is, it was difficult to stay focused on work knowing that she’d left Rey alone; her distraction is half the reason Rose picked up the rest of her shift in the first place.) Before she can get too self-conscious about it, she takes the bra off as well, amused by the way Ben has forgotten all about kissing Rey in favor of staring wide-eyed at Kira’s chest. A flippant mark like _See something you like?_ is on the tip of her tongue, but there’s something almost reverent in the way he’s looking at her that tells her that now is not the time for sarcasm.

Still, the sudden spotlight on her is a little uncomfortable, so she pushes it aside to tug at the hem of Ben’s shirt. “Off,” she says; he wastes no time in complying. Rey’s already sliding her clothing off, as efficient as ever. 

Kira loses track of who she’s touching and who she’s kissing. At some point, she’s kissing Ben while Rey is behind her, slowly sliding off Kira’s shorts as she licks a hot stripe down Kira’s spine. At another point, Ben clumsily slides his hand between Rey’s legs while Kira attempts to undo the button on his jeans. It’s almost awkward, but Kira doesn’t mind. She’s starting to get the feeling he’s never done this—any of this, not just the threesome thing—before. She knows that Rey hasn’t, which means that she’s the one with the most sexual experience in the room. _Interesting,_ she thinks. She smirks at the thought of deflowering someone in a threesome.

She hadn’t thought that Ben or Rey was paying that much attention to her face (why would they, when there’s so much else to look at right now?), but Ben asks, “What is it?” in a tone that sounds much more insecure than she’d expected.

_May as well ask outright,_ she decides. “Have you done this before?”

Ben freezes, then exchanges glances with Rey, which is enough of an answer for Kira. “Right,” she says, considering. “Do you want to stop?”

“No,” Ben and Rey both say in unison.

“Okay,” Kira says, relieved. They don’t have to worry about condoms, then. Kira is STI-free and has an IUD, and she knows that Rey’s magical space medical tech grants her an implant that functions as a contraceptive and contagious illness prevention device. (Or something like that. She didn’t really understand Rey’s explanation.)

She says as much to Ben, who nods, wide-eyed. “Okay,” he repeats, exhaling deeply.

“We can stop if you want,” she reminds them both.

“I doubt I’ll ever get the opportunity to do this again,” Rey says, an uncomfortable reminder of what her situation with Kylo is like.

“I want to keep going,” Ben adds, sounding a little more certain that he did before.

Kira feels her face break into a grin. “Perfect.”

It’s not much longer until they’re all naked. Kira’s struggling to keep herself from staring openly at Ben, worried that doing so will make him too self-conscious to continue. It’s a challenge to stop herself from finally examining the roommate she’s secretly been thirsting after for so long, after all the times she’s seen him in various states of undress. 

Ben doesn’t seem to be worried about the same thing, however; he’s staring openly at Kira and Rey. Rey’s already lying on his bed, but Kira’s still standing, slowly stroking his cock as she sucks a mark onto his neck. She’s never felt possessive like this over anyone, but there’s a part of her who wants everyone to know what they’ve done together. “This is so weird,” Ben says breathily. “You really are the same.” 

Kira stops what she’s doing and steps back. “Except for the tattoo,” he adds, tracing a hand along the stars on her chest. There’s a trail of goosebumps in his wake, and her breath hitches as he moves his hand further on down her stomach, fingers reaching between her legs. He seems surprised by how wet she is, although she’s not sure why. Did he expect her to not be turned on by this?

_Right,_ Kira thinks. She’s growing impatient, and she’s sure Rey is, too. _Enough of this._ she gently nudges Ben so that he’s lying on his back next to Rey. He’s giving Kira a look that’s someplace between nervous and astonished, like he can’t believe this is actually happening. Rey has the same look, and Kira doubts that her expression is much different. This moment is important, she realizes as she looks at Ben, although she can’t quite put her finger on why.

Or maybe she can, and now just isn’t the time and place for doing so.

“Hey, Rey,” Kira says. “Watch and learn.” With that, she positions herself so that she’s straddling Ben, leaning over him to give him a kiss. “Is this okay?” she murmurs, grinding up against him. He lets out a sharp hiss, then nods. “Tell me to stop if it isn’t,” she whispers.

“No,” he says in a rather strangled whisper. “Please keep going.” Out of all the times she’s spent fantasizing about what sex with her roommate would be like, “shy, blushing virgin” was never on the list. If Kira’s being honest, she loves seeing Ben like this: needy and desperate, all but begging her. She kisses him once more before sitting back up and sinking down onto him.

There’s a bit of a burn—he’s bigger than hers and Rey’s fingers—and she feels sharp pains on her hips as Ben’s fingers dig into her where he’s gripping her tightly. She likes it, though, and she’s pretty sure from the way he moans her name that it feels pretty damn good for him, too. She glances over at Rey, who’s watching them with a rapt expression. Kira has never been into the idea of exhibitionism, but she likes the way that her doppelganger is watching her and Ben.

Kira shifts her hips a little bit. “We good?” she asks. The words come out breathier than she expected them to be. Ben nods, loosening his grip on her hips just a little bit. Kira places her hands on his chest for leverage, leaning in to give him another kiss simply because she can before she starts moving. It takes him a moment, but soon they find a rhythm that has them both cursing and moaning.

As focused as she is on Ben right now—how could she _not_ be, considering how many times she’s thought about how he’d feel inside of her?—she hasn’t forgotten that Rey is there. She’ll have to ask Rey later if she’s having the same reaction that Kira had when she walked in on Ben and Rey kissing, if she feels like she’s having an out-of-body experience.

“Come here,” she says to Rey, and her counterpart obeys. Kira cups Rey’s face with one hand, leaving the other on Ben’s chest. (God, those _pecs_.) She feels a hand snake down to touch her clit, and the fact that she’s not sure whose hand it is makes it even hotter. The tension is building deep in her core, and she doesn’t think it’ll take much more for her to come.

“Kira,” Ben gasps. At the sound of his voice, she pulls away from Rey. “Kira, I’m going to—”

She’s still not quite there, but she wants to see Ben’s face when he comes inside of her. “Do it,” she says. “Come for me, Ben.”

And then he does. Kira knows that she’s never going to be able to forget the sounds he makes when he does. She doesn’t even think twice about peppering his face with gentle kisses as he catches his breath. With anyone else, she’d be annoyed that she hasn’t come yet, but she knows that at least one of the participants here will finish the job. They’re far from finished. 

As soon as he catches his breath, Ben’s face turns bright red. “You’re not—you didn’t—” he babbles.

“Hey,” Kira whispers, kissing his cheek. “Trust me, I’m not unsatisfied.” 

“Can I try something?” he whispers back.

She nods. “Anything you want, sweetheart.” She doesn’t notice the endearment she’s let slip. 

Ben pulls her off and flips her over like she weighs nothing (all that LARPing has built up some serious muscle, she notes). Kira barely has time to react before he’s going down on her while she’s leaning against Rey, who is murmuring into her ear about how good they look right now as she pinches Kira’s nipples in just the way she likes. The enthusiasm with which Ben is cleaning his own cum out of her might be the hottest thing Kira has ever experienced, and when she comes, her fingers are tangled in his hair and pulling hard enough that it must be painful for him.

“Holy shit, you guys,” Kira gasps, finally letting her grip on Ben’s hair slacken. “What the _fuck_ , that felt _so good._ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i ended up splitting this up; the first half of it flew off my fingers, and the second half of it is...wrestling with me. writing smut is weird like that. unfortunately i can’t give an estimate on when the other half of this will be posted, but i’m aiming to have it done by the end of august. (i'm on a "finish my WIPs" kick right now; we'll see how long that lasts lmao)


	7. There’s a first time for everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone is experiencing a first today.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to everyone leaving kudos, comments, bookmarks, and subscriptions - thank you for encouraging my is-this-a-real-kink?-i-guess-it-is-now porn.
> 
> oh and i made a moodboard for this, so there's that.

 

There are a number of things about this experience that Ben isn’t going to allow himself to think about until long after it’s finished, the least of which is the fact that he just had sex for the first time and Kira called him ‘sweetheart’ afterwards.

She barely gives him a moment to catch his breath before she’s tugging him by the hair to pull him up for a kiss. Ben has a moment of hesitation—is there a generally accepted rule about kissing after going down on someone? If there is, it must be okay, because Kira hums as her tongue slips inside his mouth.

He could easily get lost in this, knowing that he just made the object of his affection (and every sexual fantasy he’s had for the past year and a half) come with his mouth, but he hasn’t forgotten the third participant. He’s guessing that Rey wants a turn—although a turn of what (or who), he’s not sure.

Thankfully, Kira seems happy to keep taking the lead for the three of them, and she gently pushes Ben away from her lips and towards Rey’s before crawling out from between them. Ben’s inches from Rey’s lips when Kira lets out a shaky laugh, pulling his and Rey’s attention towards her. “Fuck, Ben,” she says, rolling over so that she’s laying on her back next to Rey. “Jesus. I think I need another minute to recover.” The way she’s acting makes Ben wonder if this a normal post-coital response. It’s not like he has any other experience to compare it to, obviously.

Rey laughs. “That good, huh?” Even though they’re not insulting him, the attention on Ben is making him a little self-conscious. Kira is still laying on her back, laughing softly to herself, but Rey pulls Ben in for another kiss. “I think I want to find out for myself,” she murmurs. “If you’re up for it.” 

Oh, he’s definitely _up_ for it. Already. He’s got years of Kira-induced pent-up sexual frustration to work through, and even though Rey is most certainly not his Kira, he likes her anyway. He _wants_ her anyway. Not to compare to Kira, but simply because this is fun, and he knows she’s full of her own pent-up sexual frustration with an alternate version of Ben. Even if she’s only thinking of Kylo right now, he’s happy to help out. After all, her presence was a catalyst for the opportunity for him to have sex with Kira in the first place. The least he could do is offer her a little relief in return. 

He’s already leaning over Rey, and when she pulls him closer, he lowers himself so that he’s resting his elbows on either side of her head, his hips cradled between her thighs. She’s not shy about pulling him closer, and she lets out a moan that’s swallowed up by Ben’s kiss when he starts grinding against her. Fuck, she’s so wet; he could definitely come just from this. He has a vague thought about having something new to add to his sexual fantasy list, but he’s now having a hard time focusing on anything other than Rey. Oh, sure, he’s still very aware of Kira’s presence, but she’s just watching them for the moment. He hopes she likes what she sees enough to do this again.

_No, don’t let yourself think about the future right now,_ he reminds himself. _Just enjoy this._ Kira and Rey both seem to be, certainly.

As if knowing he’s thinking about her, Kira places her hand on his back, then presses a kiss to his shoulder. She seems to have recovered enough to become an active participant again, because she’s now running her fingers through his hair, causing Ben to pause in the open-mouthed kisses he’s trailing down Rey’s neck to look up at her. Kira looks wrecked, her face still flushed and her hair a mess. Jesus. That’s an image that’s going to stick with Ben for a long, long time. “Hold on,” she murmurs. “I have an idea.”

The words _Anything you want_ are on the tip of Ben’s tongue, but he stops himself from actually saying them aloud. No sense in letting her know how desperate he still is for her. He allows Kira and Rey to push him back gently until he’s kneeling. “Flip over,” Kira tells Rey. There’s a pause where they share a look that Ben doesn’t understand. Does Rey know what Kira’s thinking? He’s still unclear as to whether or not she’s had sex with anyone other than Kira, and he has no idea what kind of porn is available in her universe. 

Rey obeys Kira without comment, pushing herself up onto her hands and knees. Ah, okay. Ben sees what they’re getting at. But what about Kira? It’s fine if she just wants to watch, but he kind of wants to see her come again.

Oh, who is he kidding, he _absolutely_ wants to see her come again. But if all she wants to do is watch, he’s totally fine with that. He’ll do whatever she wants.

“Touch her,” Kira commands, but he’s already sliding his hands along Rey’s hips, making her arch her back. Fuck, he’s always thought that Kira had a great ass, and seeing Rey like this just makes him—well.

Yeah, there are a lot of things happening right now that he’s going to use as fantasy material for years to come.

He knows that Kira meant by _Touch her_ , so he slides one hand to rest on Rey’s lower back while the other slides lower along her hip then around and up her inner thigh. He knows enough to not go rushing in even though he’s dying to know how Rey feels inside, and he likes the idea of trying to tease her a little bit. Ben bites back a curse when he feels how slick her thighs are. It’s not that he didn’t know how wet she was, but it’s still a novel sensation to slide his fingers along her slit until he brushes something that makes Rey’s whole body shudder. “Kriff,” she says, her head falling forward. She rocks her hips to rub against his hand, and it’s only then that Ben looks back up at Kira. He’s been so absorbed in Rey that he hadn’t thought to see Kira’s reaction. The only way he can describe it is _hungry_ , and _fuck_ , he never wants her to stop looking at him like that.

Kira’s leaning against the headboard, but she is by no means relaxed. “Fuck, you two look so good like that,” she says, the words sounding rather breathy. “Is that how we looked?” she asks Rey. 

“Probably,” Rey says. “Ben, I need more.”

The logical part of Ben’s brain knows that she could be referring to Kylo. But the part of his brain that’s in control loves hearing his name on her lips, and he needs more, too. He slides a finger in, adjusting it until he finds the spot that makes Rey let out another curse. When he looks up at Kira again, she’s—well, she’s still watching, but now she’s participating as well, one hand rubbing between her legs and the other massaging her breast as she watches them and _holy shit,_ she looks even better than he ever imagined. (Not that he’d ever admit how much time he’d spent fantasizing of what she looked like masturbating.)

“Ben,” Kira says. His eyes snap up to meet hers. Something about it makes his heart stutter, but he’s not going to try to figure it out right now. “Add another finger. I want to watch you fuck her soon.” 

_Shit._ He wants that, too. “Yes,” he gasps, doing as she says. Rey curses again, her hips rocking even harder against him. He understands that it’s uncomfortable and rude to just shove his cock in her without a bit of foreplay, but he’s growing impatient now, too.

“Ben,” Rey whines. “Ben, please.” His breath hitches; hearing Kira beg him to fuck her is straight out of one of his fantasies.

“Do it,” Kira urges him. “I want to see your faces as he enters you for the first time.”

It’s such a specific thing to say that Ben almost wonders if she’s thought about this particular scenario, but he doesn’t have time to dwell on it now. He’s too distracted, withdrawing his fingers from Rey in favor of lining himself up against her entrance. It takes a couple of tries—not that anyone’s complaining about his cock rubbing against Rey’s lips—but the moment he does feels just as incredible as it did the first time around. He pauses when he feels Rey tense up around him; not only is he concerned about her discomfort, but he might come too soon (again) if she stays that tight.

“Relax, Rey,” Kira murmurs. “We’ll take care of you.”

“He’s bigger than I expected,” she says, the words coming out harsh enough to alarm Ben.

Kira’s gaze flicks up to look at Ben, and she grins. “I know, right?” His breath hitches again. “Why don’t we try something,” Kira says. “He’s going to feel real good, but you need to relax a bit more, and there’s something I want to try.” 

Ben can’t figure out what she means until she turns around and scoots until she’s—oh. _Oh._ She’s going to lie under Rey and— _fuck_. Ben hadn’t even known this was a real position outside of porn.

He’s hardly conscious of the way his hands have been rubbing along Rey’s hips in order to help her relax, but now Kira’s hands are there as well. He can feel Kira’s hair brush the tops of her thighs as she and Rey settle themselves, and it’s a Herculean effort to hold himself still as he feels Rey start to relax. Jesus. He’d thought that he’d last a little longer this time since he’s already come once, but knowing that Kira’s right there, licking Rey’s clit while he fucks her, is already making him feel the familiar tension rise. When he feels Kira’s hands move from Rey’s hips to the back of his thighs, urging him forward, he takes it as a sign that they want him to move.

He moves so slowly he’s practically shaking until he’s fully inside her, his hips pressed up against her ass. Someone moans—it’s not entirely clear who—and he waits long enough to let out a ragged breath before starting to move. 

If he’d thought that watching Kira kiss Rey while riding him was hot, that has nothing on fucking Rey while she and Kira go down on each other. He’s determined to last long enough for Rey to come first, not only because he wants to make her come, but also because he wants to prove that he does have some semblance of stamina. After watching him fuck Kira, he’s positive she’s desperate to get off, and to his relief, it isn’t much longer before she’s moaning.

No, wait. That’s Kira. Judging from the way her hips are bucking, she’s the first one to come. _Fuck._ That’s nearly enough to tip Ben over the edge, and it _is_ enough to tip Rey over the edge. He can feel it when she comes, her muscles clenching around his cock, and that’s all it takes before he’s pulling out to come all over her back. Watching Rey pant while covered in his cum is yet another visual that’s going to stick with him for a very, very long time.

Kira is the first one to pull away, wiggling out from under Rey so that Rey can collapse onto the bed. “Fuck, you guys,” she says, looking up at Ben. “I’ve never come twice during sex before.”

Ben’s almost positive that Rey’s grinning exactly like Kira when she says, “I guess there’s a first time for everything, huh?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey’s post-coital conversation:
> 
> Ben: Did you and Kira plan that?  
> Rey: Nope.  
> Ben: ...did you enjoy it?  
> Rey: Kriff, yes.  
> Ben: Did that satisfy your curiosity about Kylo?  
> Rey: Not really. Now I’m even more curious about what it’d be like to fuck him.  
> Ben: Are you going to tell him about this?  
> Rey: I’m not sure yet. I don’t know how well he’d take “I had a threesome with our doppelgangers in another universe.”  
> Ben: Okay that’s fair.  
> Rey: “I kissed our doppelgangers and I liked it.”  
> Ben: …  
> Rey: “I know what you sound like when you come and I want to hear it again.”  
> Ben: …  
> Rey: Maybe I should rehearse this before I go home, huh?
> 
> the last chapter is mostly an epilogue and it's mostly finished, so expect to see that soonish? and if you like the "kira and rey are literally the same person, make them bang and get ben involved" thing, this is now a part of a series and i have third kireylo pwp in the works. (that's me, desperately throwing ff and ffm content at this fandom since 2019.)


	8. The tables have turned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey finally returns home, and Kira and Ben finally talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this whole fic is longer than it really needs to be and if you're reading this, thank you for indulging my unapologetic need to fuck around with the multiverse in order to throw ff and ffm smut content at this fandom.

The _after_ is unlike anything Kira has ever experienced. She’s never been one to enjoy snuggling after sex. The fact that she didn’t immediately leave or kick Rey out last night is a departure from her usual habit as well. Even if Rey had had someplace to go, Kira wouldn’t have wanted her to leave, and it’s the same now. She’s not sure what to do about the fact that she has the weird urge to form a sort of spooning training with her sandwiched between Ben and Rey. 

She needs to get up, though, because hygiene is important. She turns, starting to push herself up, but Ben looks up at her, making a small noise of protest. “I’ll be right back,” she murmurs, bending down to kiss him. “I promise.”  

When she comes back into Ben’s room a few minutes later, Ben and Rey are whispering about something. Once again, Kira is struck by how much it feels like an out-of-body experience to watch them. They both turn to smile at her when they notice her in the doorway. “You know, I think I’m going to go shower,” Rey says. It’s about as subtle as a brick, but Kira finds herself grateful that Rey is giving her and Ben some time to talk. 

Well, maybe grateful isn’t quite the right word. Kira has no idea what to say to him. _That was weird, right?_ sounds too flippant. _Did you want that as badly as I did?_ feels too invasive. _Can we do that again, maybe without Rey?_ is too risky. 

“Hey,” she settles on as she crawls back on the bed to curl up with Ben. 

“Hey,” he says, sounding a bit confused. He doesn’t push her away when she wraps her arm around his waist, burying her face in his chest. This might be easier if she doesn’t have to look at him. He must agree, based on the way he tentatively wraps his arms around her. She thinks she feels his lips press a gentle kiss on the top of her head, but she could just be imagining that because of how badly she wants it.

“This is so surreal,” she finally says, desperate to break the silence between them. It’s not awkward, exactly, but she has no idea what he’s thinking right now, and she’s suddenly terrified she’s going to fuck this up somehow. 

He huffs a quiet laugh. “I’m still not unconvinced that this is all one big hallucination.”

“I don’t think a hallucination can make me come that hard. Twice.”

“Yeah?”

He sounds hopeful. Kira wonders if he’s looking for reassurances that she enjoyed herself. She finds she doesn’t mind giving them. “Even better than I imagined.” With her face pressed up again his chest, she can tell how hard his heart is pounding due to her confession. Whether that’s for a good reason or a bad one, she can’t tell.

“You imagined this particular scenario?” He sounds skeptical. For a good reason, because how the hell could any of them have predicted this?

“Well, no,” she says. “The Rey factor was a surprise. The other part...” Her face is burning. What if she’s completely misinterpreting the situation? Maybe Ben only went along with this because it was his chance to have a threesome. Kira can respect that; it’s a very valid reason. 

He doesn’t respond. She’s a little confused, because he’s not pushing her away, but he’s not admitting to any sort of mutual attraction. She hopes that she hadn’t damaged their relationship as roommates by crossing this boundary. She’s spent enough time on r/relationships to know how bad of an idea it is to hook up with your roommate.

The silence is finally broken by a loud grumble of Kira’s stomach. “Come on,” Kira says, pulling away from Ben’s embrace. “Let’s go get something to eat. I think we both need it, after all that.” She doesn’t wait for a response before she’s picking up her clothing off of the floor, redressing in silence. 

 

* * *

 

Rey stays in Kira and Ben’s universe for three more days before she decides that it’s time to go home. She’s still not sure what lesson the Force wants to teach her by sending her here, but she’s learned _plenty_ from Kira. She and Kira have had sex a couple more times, and she, Kira, and Ben have repeated their encounter once. There’s an unspoken agreement that Rey and Ben aren’t going to fool around when Kira isn’t there, and eventually, Rey starts to feel like she’s intruding on their relationship. Maybe, she realizes, the lesson is that she and Kylo need to actually sit down and discuss what’s going on between them. That is much, _much_ easier said than done, however, and it makes her feel nervous when she thinks about how to go about doing that.

She and Kira talk before she leaves. “I know you feel like everyone abandons you,” Rey says, “because I feel like that, too.”

“Our parents were the fucking worst,” Kira says, nodding. 

“And I’m worried that I’m—”

Kira knows what she’s trying to say, and she doesn’t even let Rey finish the thought before she cuts her off. “You’re not abandoning me,” she assures her counterpart. “We’ve always known that this is temporary. A hiccup in the multiverse.”

“Do you think there are more Kiras and Reys out there?” _And more Bens?_ If there are, Rey wonders if she and Ben always find each other, no matter what universe they’re in.

Kira nods. “There’s a theory that there’s an infinite number of universes,” she says. “And if there’s an infinite number of universes, that means that there’s an infinite number of Reys and Kiras. Any scenario you can possibly imagine. Good, bad, in between.”

“Do you think any of them have ever met?”

“I don’t know,” Kira says, considering. “I hope so. You’ve shown me that I’m not alone.” The words tug at Rey’s heart. Something must show on her face, because Kira asks, “What is it?”

Rey has never wanted to share the details of her interactions with Kylo, but this is something she wants Kira to know. “Something Kylo said to me once,” she says softly. “I said, ‘I’ve never felt so alone.’ He told me that I wasn’t. I told him that he wasn’t, either.” She believed it at the time. 

She believes it again now.

Kira wraps her arms around Rey, locking her in a tight embrace. “I hope you two work it out,” she whispers. “I want to know that in another universe, we get a happy ending.”

 

* * *

 

Kylo has spent the last week completely on edge.

Well, more on edge than usual, anyway.

Rey has disappeared. This is different from the way they block each other out. He hadn’t realized it until he felt her wink out of existence seven day cycles ago, but even when they’re both desperately trying to ignore the bond they share, he can still feel her. This is something else. She must have cut herself off from the Force, although he can’t for the life of him understand why. Does she really hate being bonded to him that much? Sure, their bond is awkward and inconvenient most of the time, but it’s _special_. He can’t picture walking away from it. Despite everything, he’s always assumed she feels the same.

Of course, there _is_ an alternative to why he can’t feel her anymore, but he refuses to consider it. He had to do something when Hux started making comments about Snoke’s murder, but Kylo hadn’t even wanted to think about Rey in the weeks after the battle on Crait. Even in his deepest rages, he’s never wanted her dead. (Sometimes he wonders if he’s still holding out hope that she’ll change her mind about his offer.) So he did the best that he could do to pacify Hux while preventing Rey’s death: he put a bounty on her to bring her to him alive. The problem with that is he doesn’t trust Hux to not double the bounty if the Jedi is brought back dead. 

Losing Rey in the Force is like losing a limb. He’s not completely sure he’d survive if she died.

He’s in his chambers now, alone. He should be sleeping—he _wants_ to be sleeping; he’s exhausted—but he can’t stop worrying about Rey. It’s making him angry that he cares so much about her. He’s finally on the verge of falling asleep when he feels that familiar sensation, like the pressure change from being underwater. He’s on his feet before he even realizes it, seeking the source of that feeling. 

“Rey,” he breathes, not bothering to hide his relief at seeing her. There’s something a little different about her. Her hair, maybe? It’s probably just that he’s misremembering something about her. It’s been eight months since they last saw each other when the Resistance escaped Crait, after all.

“Ben,” she says in little more than a whisper. Her eyes are raking him up and down, and she’s wearing an expression he doesn’t understand. It makes him self-conscious, and he’s all too aware of how haggard he must look right now. “Hi.”

He doesn’t realize that he’s backed her into a wall until his hands are planted on either side of her head. There’s a part of him that wonders how the Force always seems to map their physical surroundings so well, since they still can’t see anything besides each other. “What happened?” The words come out in a growl. He thinks he should be embarrassed for displaying so much emotion, but he’s too relieved to care. Seeing her and feeling her in the Force again makes something in him unwind.

Not relax, necessarily. His heart is pounding at being so close to her, their bodies less than an arm’s length away from each other. She’s still giving him that unreadable look; it’s making his blood heat up. 

“What happened?” he repeats, trying to figure out what her expression means. “Where did you go?”

She’s silent for a moment, considering. “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you,” she finally says.

“Try me." 

“ _I_ barely believe it.”

“You owe me the truth.” The words slip out before he can stop them, and he winces internally. He doesn’t think she’ll take well to the idea that she owes him anything.

Rey surprises him, though. She’s always surprising him. “Fine,” she says, stepping closer. She leans in, and he wonders if she’s going to touch him. He’s laid awake on more than one night wondering what the physical limits of their Force bond are, the thoughts usually slipping into unexplored territory. These thoughts are especially important to hide from her; it’s humiliating that he’s so fixated on someone who’s supposed to be his enemy.

She whispers the next words in his ear, making him shiver. “I went to an alternate universe where there’s a version of you and I who are completely normal,” she says. “No Force. No war." 

Is such a thing possible? Kylo can’t even picture it.

Rey’s not done speaking. “Get this,” she whispers. “In that universe, we’re _roommates_.”

If they didn’t have such a strong link to each other, he’d think that she was messing with him. But she means every word she’s saying. “What…?” He doesn’t even know what to say to that.

He can almost feel her smile. “Roommates with unresolved sexual tension.”

Kylo is pretty sure he’s about to combust. He can feel his face and ears heat up, and he’s positive that she can read every single thought he’s having on his face. Even in another universe, he’s infatuated with her. What other parallels exist between them? 

It’s the next sentence that changes his worldview completely, though. “And I helped them resolve it.” 

Surely she doesn’t mean—? A thousand images burst into his mind. Every single late night thought he’s had over the past eight months, and now a thousand new ones involving two Reys. Unhelpfully, he feels his blood rush south. He knows he should back away from Rey before she finds out how strong of an effect she has on him, but he’s frozen in place. “I’m not sure that’s what the Force intended for me to learn when it brought me to them, but I learned some valuable lessons.”

_You need a teacher._ Funny how the tables have turned. As if reading his mind, she says, “I could show you, if you want.” She pauses, and he gets the sense that she’s working herself up to say the next words. “I enjoyed fucking the other you, but I think I’d enjoy fucking you more." 

Kylo’s brain short-circuits.

 

* * *

 

Rey is gone, back to her universe. She drew the diagram that she said brought her to Kira and Ben, explaining that “All I did was meditate on it, and then a door appeared. Maybe you can use it to visit me, too.” Ben and Kira are still not sure what that means, but Kira says she’s going to hold on to the drawing just in case she ever figures it out. “We can take a vacation in space,” she’d joked as Rey was explaining what the diagram meant.

Rey had given her a look. “I’m in the middle of a war,” she’d said. “I don’t think it’s going to be a vacation.” Ben has to admit, he’s curious about Kylo. Rey and Kira seem to share a strange intimacy, knowing that they’re different versions of the same person. Ben wonders if he’d share the same with his counterpart. (Well, not necessarily the sex thing, although that provides some... _interesting_ possibilities that he wouldn’t say no to exploring.) In all the time he’s known her, Kira has never seemed that comfortable with anyone. 

Well, maybe except him. He’s never been this close to a roommate before. They cook meals together occasionally, they have TV shows they watch together, and they go shopping together if they need to get anything for their apartment. His past roommates have been temporary, usually moving out after a year or less. Not Kira. And now that things have changed between them…

Things _have_ changed between them. Right?

It’s a little awkward with Kira the first day after Rey leaves. It was like having her around was a buffer, and even though the mutual attraction he feels with Kira is out in the open, they have yet to sit down and talk about it. He still can’t tell if she meant it as a one-time (well, a two-time) thing or not. Maybe she doesn’t want to be with him when it’s just the two of them. He wouldn’t be surprised. He’s used to people abandoning him, and even though she’d snuggled with him after both of the threesomes they’d had with Rey, he’s not sure what that meant. It’s not like he has any other experience to draw on, after all.

_Dinner. I should make her dinner._ He wants to do something for her, and the task of cooking her favorite meal (waffles, bacon, and homefries) distracts him just enough that he’s not spiraling into a panic attack over what to say to her. He’s finishing up the homefries when she wanders into the kitchen, looking surprised at the two plates laid out at the table. “I was just about to go get you,” he says. “I cooked you dinner.”

“Thank you,” she says, smiling at him. And that smile, that’s...it’s everything. His heart is pounding now that she’s here and he no longer has the process of cooking to distract him, but when she gives him that smile, he thinks that maybe this might actually work out in his favor.

Or maybe he’s just projecting his own feelings onto her, and she’s about to tell him that she’s moving out because they’ve crossed a boundary that shouldn’t have been crossed.

They eat in silence for a few minutes before Kira pushes her plate away suddenly and turns to him. “We should talk,” she says.

_Fuck. Here it comes._ “We should,” he agrees. He’s almost afraid to look at her because he doesn’t know what her expression is going to say, but this is a conversation they can’t just have while staring down at a table.

“About what happened,” she says. It sounds like she’s trying to find the words, and he braces himself for the worst. _It was a mistake. It can never happen again._ But to his surprise, she doesn’t say anything like that at all. “I don’t want it to be a one-time thing.” 

He’s not sure which part of _it_ she’s talking about. “I’m not sure if we’re ever going to have a version of you from another universe randomly appear in our living room again,” he says dryly, attempting to hide how hard his heart is now pounding.

“That’s not what I meant.”

He hates himself for being unable to stop the slight tremor in his voice when he asks, “What did you mean?”

“We can’t go back to the way things were before,” she explains, “but I don’t want to.”

Hope blooms in his chest. “I don’t either.”

“Rey was right,” she says. “There’s something between us. I think there has been for a while.” 

He nods slowly. “I’ve never done this before,” he admits. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

Kira has never said much about her relationship history. Ben has never been able to figure out if that’s because she doesn’t want him to know, or if it’s because she doesn’t have a history to talk about. “I’m not exactly an expert myself.”

He doesn’t respond for a long moment. “I don’t want this to just be a sex thing,” he says quietly. Nervously.

Something unwinds in his chest at the sight of her hopeful expression. “Me either,” she says, reaching across the table to take his hand.

He looks down at their joined hands, then back up to meet her eyes. “Are you saying we should...date?” 

There’s no way she’s going to agree to it, but she says “Yes,” in such a certain tone of voice that he realizes she actually means it. “We should. I want that. Unless you…?” 

“No,” he says quickly. “I want that. I’ve wanted that for a long time.” If there’s any time to tell her how long he’s been in love with her, it’s now.

She smiles, and before he realizes what’s happening, she slides her chair out from the table and sits on his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck. The waffles are going to get cold, but he likes that he’s the one thing she finds more important than food right now. “Me too.” His arms wrap around her waist tentatively; he’s unsure of what her boundaries are. He realizes after a minute how silly that is; _she’s_ the one who closed the distance between them. 

She’s mere inches away from his lips when he says, “One more thing.” She pauses, pulling away to look at him. “That threesome was great and I’m glad it happened, but if we do this, if we start a—a relationship, I don’t want it to involve anyone else. Just you and me.”

“Of course,” Kira says like it was implied. “If Rey comes back, though, would you do that again? Because I would.”

Ben laughs softly. “It was like seeing double. I heard you guys the other night, you know. I can’t believe you let me join in the second time.”

He doesn’t think she’s kidding when she asks, “What if she brings Kylo next time?” 

The look on Ben’s face must give her an answer, and when she kisses him, he knows that they’re going to do just fine, whether or not their counterparts make their way here again.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please let me know if you liked this fic! i had a fun time writing ff and ffm smut about a really weird multiverse situation and i plan on doing so again in the future, but i always appreciate feedback, especially given that this is rather, uh...niche.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm on tumblr as [radioactivesaltghoul](https://radioactivesaltghoul.tumblr.com/) and twitter as [r_saltghoul](https://twitter.com/r_saltghoul), and I welcome feedback on this, especially since this fic involves stuff I don't normally write about!


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